I met the gayest kid at work this weekend…no seriously, like he was 7 and super gay and it was AWESOME. This was our convo.
KID: I like your shirt.
ME: Why thank you, little man.
KID: I love to shop.
ME: Really? I hated shopping when I was younger.
KID: (rolls eyes) Why would you hate shopping?
ME: I dunno. It probably had something to do with me being fat.
KID: You were fat?
Silence.
KID: Gross.
ME: Oh it was bad.
KID: When I turn eight I’m going to do fashion.
ME: How old are you now?
KID: Seven.
ME: Why not just do it now?
KID: Cause you have to be seven. When I turn eight I think I’ll apply here too.
ME: Really? Here. I’m in like hell here.
KID: Maybe you’re just not doing it right.
ME: I guess not.
KID: My grandma won’t take me to build-a-bear. I just want to buy more outfits.
ME: You know you could learn how to sew and then make all your clothes when you do fashion.
KID: Oh no….(rolls eyes) I won’t be doing the sewing.
ME: So if you’re going to do fashion when you’re eight…what do you want to do when you grow up?
KID: Popstar.
ME: Can you sing?
KID: (rolls eyes) Can I sing.
ME: Wait, can you?
KID: (Rolls eyes) Yes. I can sing.
ME: Do you like Lady Gaga?
KID: (Rolls eyes) Who doesn't love Lady Gaga?!
ME: Yeah, she's great. She's the new Cher. Everyone says she's the new Madonna, but really she's the new Cher. Do you know who Cher is?
KID: (Rolls eyes) Of course I know who Cher is. Jesus Christ.