I’ve officially been on the pill for the past two days. Dun. Dun. Dun. And I’ve already officially forgotten to take the pill in the past two days.
Annnnnnnnnnnd I’ve also had some red wine, (for those of you that know me personally, you know this is going to be an interesting post).
It’s crazy how much one person can affect your life.
Can I do that? Am I allowed to switch from the subject of oral contraceptives to overly emotional perspectives, that most people won’t know what I’m talking about specifically, but will be able to relate to nonetheless? Am I allowed to blame the abrupt switch on the pill (or lack of taking the pill)?
I had a chat with one of my best friends today, and she said the thing that we all, as people with lady who-hah’s have said on more than one occasion. “I know how stupid I sound, but I don’t know how to stop.”
None of us do. When it’s that one person, that brings us back to that one emotion, or that one place in time that made us truly happy. You don’t want to lose that, and even when you feel yourself getting over whatever was holding you back, you revert. It scares you how easily it was to move on. Making you wonder if it was that easy for the other in said situation.
The thought of them getting over you so quickly makes you sick to your stomach, so sick (and perverse) that you latch back on to a moment of pure monumental bliss with that person, leading you to cry publicly in a playground and stupidly thinking, “if I can’t get over them…then they won’t get over me.”
Uh, no. That is retarded, girl who is writing this post. That might be the most ill conceived plan I have ever heard in my life. And secondly, you have way too much pride for that bullshit. So let’s can some perspective and get real for a hot sec.
Check it.
Number one, they have made no effort in contacting you. There has been no drunken texting, no somber pleas for even some vague place in your life. They don’t care. They are over it. To them it was just “banter.” Which inevitably was the one thing you needed to hear to get you set in the right direction. Don’t revert back now. It’s not worth it. And it never will be.
Number two, you have both picked your careers. Something you will either regret or cherish for the rest of your life. Right now? You have no fucking clue. Well, you have an opinion on the matter, you personally think a highly successful career and a highly successful marriage cannot be had at the same time. Whether that opinion is right or wrong, only time will tell.
Number three, you are allowed to feel this way. You are allowed to be mad. You are allowed to be furious. You are allowed to miss your best friend like crazy. But just remember this moment is fleeting. This feeling of self-pity and confusion can only last for so long. You hide it so well from others, it’s only a matter of time before that person becomes a vague mention of shortcomings and bad timing in your life.
Number four, they were great. And that is why this is so hard. For once in your life, you fell for someone who wasn’t a dick (and/or bitch). They were supportive, heartfelt and sincere. Which yes, makes you question why that abrupt change was so easy for them but you can’t linger on that thought.
It will only make the process a little bit harder.
Inevitably, it all sucks. It’s such a natural part of life that you can’t fight it. But you are allowed to be pissed how easily rom-com’s make heartbreak look. Katherine Heigl only needs five to seven minutes of “Heigel sad face” close-ups before that bitch looks like she’s been injected with a shit-ton of uppers.
That is not how life works.
Making me think Katherine Heigl is not a real person, but rather an alien, with an alien embryo feeding inside her skinny ass body. So yes, what inevitably I’m getting to is the fact that the world is going to end, and it’s going to be at the hands of Heigl’s alien embryo baby-thingy that is going to splat out of her stomach in her next upcoming movie titled, “Knocked Up (with an Alien Embryo in my Body).”