I fucking love living with a dude (I’m not sleeping with). It fucking rocks.
I’ve lived with plenty of ladies, and let’s get real for one hot sec. Bitches be crazy. Like seriously…I’ve lived with many crazy ladies…and that shit is not fun.
Like…I don’t know what the fuck is going on up in their heads…but I am not a fan.
“YOU HATE ME DON’T YOU, NATALIE! DON’T YOU?!?!
“Well…yeah….”
Side note: I’m going to a shit ton of texts from former roommates saying,
“That post was really funny….WAS I THE CRAZY ROOMMATE?!?!?!?!?!?!”
“Well…yeah….”
But with a dude there is no crazy bullshit. No weird girly passive aggressiveness. There is no awkward
“I ain’t fucking doing the dishes, cause I did them last week” standoff that lasts for three weeks. Which leads to the crazy one to putting all her clean utensils in her underwear drawer… leaving you with only a spatula to eat your yogurt.
And I think that’s why girls get a bad rep…majority of you are crazy. I’m only weird. Weird can somehow be camouflaged as charming. How? I still haven’t figured that one out yet. But I know it’s a possibility.
Crazy though? You can’t really hide that fact for more than a week, tops. And my favorite part about crazies is they never fucking know that they are in fact crazy. They never understand why the shit they are doing is deemed crazy. They think you are crazy and a heartless bitch for not understanding the severity of their mindless crazy gibberish.
“I see absolutely nothing wrong with legitimately crying from pure rage jealousy when my boyfriend said he liked your car. ”
“Oh yeah. That’s not crazy at all. Oh no, especially after I said, “Thanks” to your boyfriend who was obviously just making small talk you ran into the apartment and locked yourself in your room for two hours, leaving me to awkwardly sit in silence with your boyfriend whom I had just recently met twenty minutes earlier… Only to have you read me a letter you wrote to me (which you managed to read while simultaneously crying…bravo!) regarding how you felt about the situation at hand. No. No. No. None of that is fucking crazy.”
Come on! Can you just get out of your fucking deluded sense of reality? If your roommates not doing the dishes is the worst part of your day…you’re doing good…also you are most definitely from the Caucasian persuasion.
Moral of the story: …crazy bitches piss Natalie the fuck off!
Boom.